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Narcissism: More than a Personality Disorder

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For years, I believed that Narcissism is just a word for someone who is self-obsessed about his/her looks, beauty, intelligence, wealth etc. It never crossed my mind that Narcissism is more than that. Even when India began to be ruled by a Narcissistic King, even then, it never occurred to me to look up and study about Narcissism and Narcissists.

A personal encounter of a close kind took me on a journey to uncover the cause behind the mind-boggling intelligence displayed by my wife. The smear campaign she indulged in was so subtle and well timed that by the time(i.e. years later) I realized what she actually intended to by passing on private, confidential information to outsiders, the damage had already been done. The mind-numbing pain she caused was so intense that if I would not have come to know about Narcissism or in medical terminology, Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD), I would have either committed suicide or would have continued in depression. The deftness employed to create confusion was so precise and perfectly timed that it ripped me apart. A relationship with a Narcissist is a soul-crushing experience; once you are on the road with a Narc, you sure are on the way to hell. Having known and read Bible and the Biblical characters referred to as the Devil and his demons, i had a faint clue as to who i was dealing with or sleeping with.

The whole picture became clear only when i happened to read about Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) on Quora and the personal accounts of many victims of Narcissists. It was then I realized that i am not alone who happened to be a victim of a Narcissist. It was then that I found that I with all my weaknesses and shortcomings was not the one to be blamed for the acts of my wife.

Colleagues
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We all have come across Narcissists. Its just that because we aren't aware of the concept of demons walking in flesh and blood, that we ignore or adjust to such individuals. Yet, they are out there, may be, as our parents, brothers, sisters, children, spouse, relatives, friends, colleagues or acquaintances. We assume that they are flawed individuals and that's that. We may pity them because of their poverty during their childhood. We may sympathize with them because of their having been deprived of parental love during their childhood. We may empathize with them for the mental, physical and/or sexual abuse they suffered during their childhood. We may assist them in their endeavor to rise up higher in their personal, professional, and social lives. But, they are not mere flawed individuals. 

Poverty, deprivation of parental love and abuse during formative years surely play a dominant role in these individuals yet they are not a result or consequence of those events. But these three events surely imbibed in them an ambitious spirit. 

So, who is a Narcissist? Or, what is Narcissism? At the outset, Narcissism is more than just a personality disorder, as they would want us to believe. Because of the fact that they don't believe in Bible or they don't want to believe in God of the Bible, the existence of Devil and his army of demons, that they have coined the word, Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). A Narc, from the outside, is just like a normal human being, going about his/her normal course in life. A medical practitioner can or will never be able to diagnose an individual with NPD because of the fact that they have all their faculties functioning at the optimum level. They don't scream or howl like a madman. They don't wallow in filth or dirt. They don't live in far-away isolated locations or in caves and dens. They live, eat and work among us.

A Narc's ability to create or spin stories displays their creative mind. Their ability to take and answer questions, logically, defies interrogators. Their prowess in engaging their audience is a result of their communication skills. Thus, these individuals can never be diagnosed as mentally disabled persons or incarcerated for their crimes.

To understand Narcissism, we have to understand the Biblical character, by the name of Lucifer. Our first full introduction of this creature is written in Ezekiel 28: 11-17, "Moreover, the word of the Lord came to me: 12 “Son of man, raise a lamentation over the king of Tyre, and say to him, Thus says the Lord God:

“You were the signet of perfection, full of wisdom and perfect in beauty. 13 You were in Eden, the garden of God; every precious stone was your covering, sardius, topaz, and diamond, beryl, onyx, and jasper, sapphire, emerald, and carbuncle; and crafted in gold were your settings and your engravings. On the day that you were created they were prepared. 14 You were an anointed guardian cherub. I placed you; you were on the holy mountain of God; in the midst of the stones of fire you walked. 15 You were blameless in your ways from the day you were created, till unrighteousness was found in you. 16 In the abundance of your trade you were filled with violence in your midst, and you sinned; so I cast you as a profane thing from the mountain of God, and I destroyed you, O guardian cherub, from the midst of the stones of fire. 17 Your heart was proud because of your beauty; you corrupted your wisdom for the sake of your splendor. I cast you to the ground; I exposed you before kings, to feast their eyes on you."


Let's look at the qualities of this personality as revealed in the scripture. First, in verse 12, it says, "You were the signet of perfection, full of wisdom and perfect in beauty."

Perfect and full of intelligence

Lucifer, the Devil was a perfect creature and this same feature is reflected in all Narcs. They have expertise in just about anything and everything. Their knowledge is vast. They are full of wisdom, earthly intelligence as to how to convince, persuade, manipulate, lie and yet get away unscathed. Outwardly, they look beautiful. There is no flaw in their facial and physical features. They consider themselves as High Net Worth individuals. 

Pride

In Verse 17, it says, "Your heart was proud because of your beauty; you corrupted your wisdom for the sake of your splendor." These creatures are obsessed about their facial and physical features.

Dandy

Verse 13 details how this Angel was decorated with precious jewels. All Narcs have an immense desire to dress up, to apply make-up, love jewels, wear a pretentious outfit, they love the dandy look. Depending on their financial capability, they either get to fulfill their desires or continue to retain such urge.

Play victim

In verse 15, it says, "You were blameless in your ways...". All Narcs continue to pretend that they are the victims of abuse. All Narcs maintain innocence unless hard, undisputed, undeniable facts and truths are presented to expose them. All Narcs blame others for their past and current situations. They never accept blame. They still assume that they are blameless, faultless. They still harbor the misconception that they exist in Pre-Fall period.

Violent

In verse 16, it says, "you were filled with violence in your midst...". All Narcs are violent. They are extremely abusive, verbally and physically. They may have a calm exterior but they nurture a violent nature. They explode when exposed. Narcs do not know the path of peace. All their acts and speeches are designed to instigate violence.

In Isaiah 14:12-14, the Bible details a bit more on the fall of this creature, referred here as the Day Star and son of Dawn. It says, "How you are fallen from heaven, O Day Star, son of Dawn! How you are cut down to the ground, you who laid the nations low! 13 You said in your heart, ‘I will ascend to heaven; above the stars of God I will set my throne on high; I will sit on the mount of assembly in the far reaches of the north; 14 I will ascend above the heights of the clouds; I will make myself like the Most High."

Ambitious

Lucifer the angel had a huge ambition that to overthrow God Himself. All Narcs exhibit this quality. All of them are highly ambitious. They want to scale heights, cross insurmountable barriers to become wealthy, rich, powerful, even becoming a king. An unwavering ambition that defies all odds, logic and commonsense. In their pursuit to become rich, wealthy, strong, powerful, they will not let anything or anyone come in their way. They are not inhibited by the laws of the land or social customs, rules, regulations. They do not consider anybody as authority or head. They are their own boss. You can't shake them off of their fantasy.


Angel of Light

In 2 Corinthians 11: 14-15, Apostle Paul writes, "And no wonder, for even Satan disguises himself as an angel of light. So it is no surprise if his servants, also, disguise themselves as servants of righteousness. Narcs, always present themselves as helpful, courteous, bring hope, create bliss, portray an image of being a perfect human being, draw a silver lining over the horizon. But its all a facade. Its a disguise. PM swachh Bharat Yojana (PM's Clean India plan), India shining, eradication of black money, corruption, Make in India initiative etc. are few examples.

Wanderer

In Job 1: 7, the Lord said to Satan, “From where have you come?” Satan answered the Lord and said, “From going to and fro on the earth, and from walking up and down on it.” and again in Job 2:2, and the Lord said to Satan, “From where have you come?” Satan answered the Lord and said, “From going to and fro on the earth, and from walking up and down on it.” In 1 Peter 5:8, Apostle Peter cautions to "Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour." All Narcs avoid staying at home. They love to roam, travel, prowl. They are restless beings, they can't stay within the confines of four walls of a home. In their convoluted imagination, home seems like a cage. They desire to be a free bird.

Create confusion and defy authority

In Genesis 3:1, the Bible tells us, now the serpent was more crafty than any other beast of the field that the Lord God had made. He said to the woman, “Did God actually say, ‘You shall not eat of any tree in the garden’?” And again in Job 1:9, "Then Satan answered the Lord and said, “Does Job fear God for no reason?" All Narcs question an accepted fact, truth. The questions are intended to create confusion in the mind of a listener or interrogator. This is one of the reasons why it is so difficult, nearly impossible to investigate and prosecute a Narc. Kodhathai murder case is a classic example of this. All Narcs defy authority and/or instigate others to defy authority, legal or otherwise.

Lover of Money

In 1 Timothy 6:10, "For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils." All Narcs love money. Since evil they are at the core, their want money. So, they will deprive you of your money, in one way or the other. They want your money at all cost. That's how they deprive you of your purchasing power, reduce your financial capability. As a result, you are stuck in that relationship because now you don't have the ability to fight back or take a flight out. They want you at their beck and call. They find an evil pleasure in doing so. Demonetization, consistent price increase in petrol/diesel, loss of employment, negative growth, faulty policies, ignoring key growth areas, deliberate wastage of money on personal aggrandizement are examples of this behavior.

Smear Campaign

In 1 John 2:1, the Bible informs us, "My little children, I am writing these things to you so that you may not sin. But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous." Devil accuses Christians before our Father but the Bible tells us that we have Jesus Christ who intercedes on our behalf. All Narcs run smear campaign to arraign their opponent, spouse, parents, children, sibling, colleague or friend. They are good at it. They discredit, belittle, insult, humiliate, bad-mouth their opponents. Anyone who challenges their status quo is their opponent. The smear campaign was so successful that before they could defend or correct or clear the narrative that was being spread, they lost the election.
 

Christian Impossible

 It is the bondage of religion, traditions, society's pressure, rituals, ego and false belief system which restrains men from following Jesus Christ and the irony is, a new set of religion, traditions, rituals, false belief system that is not approved by Bible are the very ones which holds Christians from going back to their old religion, traditions and false belief system. The difference is now they are caught in a Christian religion, ego, traditions and rituals of the church and family, pressure of/from Christian society, and the false belief that they belong to Christ when their decision was just a fleeting moments of emotion under false presentation of the Gospel, without having known or understood the gravity of being a Christian.

For it is not possible for a good soil not to yield at least some fruit when it has consistently received good and strong seed, pure water, sunshine without any obstructions, pollution free air, unadulterated nutrients, self-less care and protection. It has to be a false soil. However times I may sow and in whatever ways I sow, they won’t yield which goes on to prove that they were never a true soil to work on.

Have they not heard what God said to humankind in Genesis, “My Spirit shall not strive with man forever, for he is indeed flesh.” Genesis 6:3

Did not Jesus cry out at their refusal to yield to Him when He said, “How often I wanted to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, but you were not willing!”

What did he follow it with? Judgment! He prophesied and said, “See! Your house is left to you desolate.”

Casteism in India and Untouchability

On the last day of a whitewash contract, while my team of Painters was working in a flat, the lady of the house told the man of the house that once the work is complete, we need to throw away the bottle from which the Painters drank water.

Following the same pattern, which is way too common, i along with my team of Painters, noticed that the cups in which tea is served to us in the afternoon, are either plastic or paper cups or are designated cups, which are discarded or kept separate or distinct, once the work is complete.

Welcome to the World of Casteism and Untouchability in Indian homes. Casteism in India is a deeply rooted phenomenon, is alive and thriving well in the well-to-do, educated, working professionals (including IT professionals), working in Multi-National Companies, many of whom have even visited foreign countries and are exposed to US and England's culture.

And yet they refuse to let go of this despicable and shameful Caste discrimination based solely of social status. All of the times, I’ve experienced this, I felt awful. It is so shocking to see such actions from individuals who reside in societies, whose children study in best of the English medium schools.

All of the education, exposure to international culture, travels to foreign countries are futile and have failed to eradicate or alter the mindset of Indians. Casteism and Untouchability is an inherent part of social structure. Indians cannot and will not comprehend the fact that people who are doing manual work are no lesser than them. Manual labour, in any form, is considered a menial job and thus to be looked down upon. They themselves won’t and can’t do it and yet they won’t respect others who do it for them.

With their little brains, they can’t comprehend the fact that whitewashing or home painting involves Art as well as Science. Painting a home or a flat involves mathematical calculation as to the amount of paint to be bought and consumed, based on the size of walls and ceiling, understanding of colors and their association with each other, labour days and labour cost to be calculated based on the size of flat or a house, customer handling skills, and communication skills. A Painter holds the paint brush or a roller in such a manner that not a drop of paint falls on the ground. It is a matter of Art that he or she ensures that while painting the edges of walls, he doesn’t let the brush or roller touch the other wall or surface. In addition to these, a Painter or a Contractor needs to possess honesty, integrity, and marketing skills, an understanding of different cultures based on religion, language, age, education, sex and geographic location.

Caste system and Untouchability is here to stay and I don’t find any near end to it. There is one way around for those at the receiving end to react to such inhumane, shameful discrimination by understanding and studying the mindset of individuals practicing Casteism and Untouchability.

First, those who are involved in manual labour like painting a home or whitewashing a flat should work on their personal grooming. Wear good, clean and fitting clothes, shoes, and socks. Attend to your personal hygiene. Have an hair cut, apply hair oil, cut your nails, apply cream on your arms and hands (during winters and after every day’s work), have a clean work overalls, quit chewing tobacco, clean your teeth, abstain from using abusive and filthy language.

One of the most effective ways to change or alter the mindset of an individual is by making him or her change his or her preferred taste in music and movies. A vast majority of those who practice Casteism in India and the ones at the receiving end are the ones who are still engrossed in their regional music and movies. Allow them to be exposed to the finest nuances of English music and movies. An exposure to the finest of music and movies from a very tender age is bound to completely alter the hearts and minds of Indians who still believe and practice discrimination based on the despicable Caste system.

The Mystery of a Relationship

Its hard or rather very difficult to imagine the amount of hatred or anger that a person can harbor against their ex. Do you get to a point of killing that person? Do you get to the level of lying? Is the scent of the scalp of your once-loved one so sweet that if an opportunity falls in your lap, you are willing to ruin the career of your ex.? Should a person be so engrossed in their own illusionary thoughts, imaginations, ideas that he/she should negate all the positive vibes, acts of restoration, forgiveness that her/his loved one is sending across? Is any sin, wrong, error or a mistake unforgivable at all? There are innumerable questions that have been bogging my mind. I know, I'll never have the answers to these. At least, I've communicated them.


Is it too hard to forgive someone who is doing all his/her best to being forgiven? Every one makes a mistake. Well, I've mine in thousands. Then, I'm an exception. I wonder why people bring egos in their relationship. The moments I spent on my knees in front of her are very cherished memories. May be, I'll never forget that. Hmmm.. I've never done that before or later. That's one exclusive act of love, commitment, worship that I've never duplicated. Never will.


If I have to delve into my own life, then yes, of course, I have been through this stage as well. But then, it was a mixture of both love, anger and hatred. I couldn't accept being at the receiving end at almost all of the time. Being ditched is not what I ever asked for. Breaking apart is a part of a relationship. I should have made a provision for that. Alas, I never did.


I have come to believe that people who go (leave), never come back. Try hard as you may. I remember the old Hindi film song, 'chahe bhejo hazaro salaam, wo phir nahin aate, wo phir nahin aate'.Lesson of the game: Love is a treasure. Once gone, forever gone.

A nation of cowards or is it?

I, due to my personal experiences, encounters and observations, for a considerable period of time held a firm view that we Indians are cowards who are afraid to stand, speak and fight for the truth, our rights, against wrongs, injustice and wicked people. India is not a land of cowards as they want to make us believe. One doesn't need lot of courage to kill. Depravity of mind will do. A mind full of evil and a heart full of hatred and wickedness will suffice to kill and rape. The ones who resort to threatenings, rape, and  murder are the ones who are cowards because they are the ones who are attempting to silence every voice of dissention lest their wickedness is revealed.

And then I came across people like Judge Brijgopal Harkishan Loya, Senior Executive Editor, Ravish Kumar of NDTV, Journalist Niranjan Takle of Caravan Magazine, Journalist Rohini Singh of The Wire, Journlist Josy Joseph of The Hindu, to name a few, all of whom have risked their lives to not only uncover but to speak and stand for the truth during a time when almost all the major news media outlets have continued to exhibit an indifferent attitude and maintain a stoic silence over the disclosures made by these journalists.

These guys too are ordinary individuals just like you and me. They too have a family, relatives and friends who are concerned about the safety and well-being of these guys and who they are accountable to. They too have to go out to the market to buy vegetables, or go for a stroll in the mornings or evenings. They too like ordinary individuals come back home alone at night. They too may have had their fears, but they, while fighting the fear within, staked their all to uncover the truth and stand, speak and fight for the truth.

The amazing thing about it all is that these guys aren't even saved, have not known or  experienced the saving grace of Jesus Christ but for the sake of truth have given it all. They, for the present truth and have staked their eternity. How much more should we Christians, who have known and tasted Jesus Christ and His redemptive work, stand, speak and fight for the truth.

The current evil government has, through multiple organs available at its disposal, attempted to instill fear into our lives and has even succeeded in making us to believe that we are a nation of cowards. That it is futile to stand, speak and fight for the truth. That there would be no one to stand up to defend you. It may all be true but these few guys have shown, while they fought the war against fear within themselves and knowing fully well that they would be an easy prey against the powers that be, a remarkable courage, and are worthy of honor.

Being Holy: Biblical Perspective, Final


Reason number three, because of His son’s sacrifice on the cross. Paul in I Cor 6: 19 and 20 says, ‘Do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s.’ For you were bought with a price. You do not belong to yourself. You do not own yourself. You are a slave to Christ. You cannot do what you want to do.

Do you realize how difficult it is to go out in the streets, knocking doors as a salesman? As a salesman, I have done door to door sales and I know how difficult it is to make yourself get out of your room, shed your ego and shame and go knocking. I have stood in the malls and exhibitions approaching people, we call it prospecting. Do you realize how difficult it is? All salesmen do whatever it takes to procrastinate, postpone the prospect of going out and making cold calls. And Jesus having shed His glory and honor endured the shame and humiliation of being beaten and spit upon. If that was not enough, he was made to walk all the way to the Calvary, making himself a spectacle in front of the whole crowd who had gathered to see this event. If people didn’t know Him, it would have been easier for Him to go unrecognized as just another criminal being punished for his crime. But here He was, among the same people whom He taught daily in the synagogue, whom He healed, spoke great monologues. They knew Him and that’s why they mocked Him. He faced treachery from His own people, falsely convicted, humiliated and mocked by soldiers, endured pain due to the beatings and crown of thorns, isolated at the cross, died the death of a criminal. He did it because He chose to suffer for our sake. Jesus said in Jn 10:17b-18, ‘I lay down My life that I may take it again. No one takes it from Me, but I lay it down Myself. I have power to lay it down, and I have power to take it again.’ II Cor 5:15, ‘And He died for all, that those who live should live no longer for themselves, but for Him who died for them and rose again.’ Peter in I Pet 1:18 and 19 says this, ‘Knowing that you were not redeemed with corruptible things, like silver and gold, from your aimless conduct received by tradition from your fathers but with the precious blood of Christ, as of a lamb without blemish and without spot.’

Reason number four, because you are saved. God demands holiness because He is holy. God demands holiness because He hates sin. God demands holiness because of His son's sacrifice on the cross. God demands holiness because you are saved, transformed, redeemed, new creation. So, do not conform yourselves to the former lusts. II Pet 1:14. Conduct (behave) yourselves throughout the time of your stay in fear. I Pet 1:17. Fear means reverence.

God demands holiness from people who do not know Him for even though they may not know the True and Living God, they have a conscience which either accuses them or excuses them. Rom 1:19, 2:14, 15. How much more pertinent it is for those who are God's children to yield to this demand of their God.

Being Holy: Biblical Perspective, Part 5



Reason number two, because God hates sin. Why you should pursue holiness? Because God hates sin. Sin is an affront to God’s holiness. God hates sin. Sin is an insult to God. Sin demeans God’s holiness and His authority. How much does He hate it? Listen to what God says of his anointed cherub, an angelic being in Ezekiel 28: 11-17, ‘Moreover the word of the LORD came to me, saying, “Son of man, take up a lamentation for the king of Tyre, and say to him, ‘Thus says the Lord GOD: “You were the seal of perfection, full of wisdom and perfect in beauty. You were in Eden, the garden of God; every precious stone was your covering: the sardius, topaz, and diamond, beryl, onyx, and jasper, sapphire, turquoise, and emerald with gold. The workmanship of your timbrels and pipes was prepared for you on the day you were created. “You were the anointed cherub who covers; I established you; you were on the holy mountain of God; you walked back and forth in the midst of fiery stones. You were perfect in your ways from the day you were created, till iniquity was found in you. “By the abundance of your trading you became filled with violence within, and you sinned; therefore I cast you as a profane thing out of the mountain of God; and I destroyed you, O covering cherub, from the midst of the fiery stones. “Your heart was lifted up because of your beauty; you corrupted your wisdom for the sake of your splendor; I cast you to the ground…”

This is the origin of Satan. He was perfect in all sense: being, wisdom and beauty. He was in the Garden of Eden, he walked on the holy mountain of God, he had many responsibilities, he was the anointed one, yet the moment he sinned, God threw him out of heaven. God hates sin in its entirety. As far as east is from the west, so far away is our God from sin. Sin has no place in heaven and no one who is tainted with sin can or will ever be able to make his/her way to heaven. God is serious about sin and does not push it under the carpet.

Being Holy: Biblical Perspective, Part 4



We will begin our discussion with the question on, 'why holiness is important'? Why holiness is an absolute must? Then, we will seek to find as to how to be holy. Let’s begin our study with the question, why holiness…why holiness?

Reason number one, because He is holy. Holiness is one of the central themes of the Bible. It is the thread which runs through the fabric of the Bible. You cannot separate God of the Bible from holiness. He is holy and demands that they who approach Him, approach Him in holiness. He is so holy that even the Seraphims, the angelic beings referred to in Isaiah 6:2,3 cover their faces with two of their wings, feet with another two of their wings and with another two they flew saying one to another, ‘Holy, holy, holy is the LORD of hosts; the whole earth is full of His glory. In I Timothy 6:16 Paul says, ‘ Who alone has immortality, dwelling in unapproachable light, whom no man has seen or can see, to whom be honor and everlasting power. Amen.’ His dwelling place is unapproachable light, which speaks of symbolically of His absolute holiness. http://www.biblegateway.com/resources/commentaries/IVP-NT/1Tim/Timothy-Man-God.

Look at Exodus chapter 19 and starting from verse 11, ‘And let them be ready for the third day. For on the third day the LORD will come down upon Mount Sinai in the sight of all the people. Verse 12, ‘You shall set bounds for the people all around, saying, ‘take heed to yourselves that you do not go up to the mountain or touch its base. Whoever touches the mountain shall surely be put to death.’ In I Jn 1:5, Apostle John says, ‘…that God is light and in Him is no darkness at all.’ Darkness refers to sin. God is holy and He does not want anyone to undermine His holiness.

This is the reason He demands holiness from His people. If we have to approach this God, we will have to do it by conforming to His standard. You think that ‘now that I am saved, it doesn’t matter how I live, I will anyways end up in heaven’, listen to what God says in Hebrews 12: 14, ‘Pursue peace with all people and holiness, without which no one will see the Lord.’ If you have an unholy lifestyle and still consider yourself as saved, you need to reconsider your standing. If there is an unbroken pattern of sin in your life, that is an alarm screaming at you about your unredeemed status. A holy life is a proof of your redeemed status. In Matt 5:48, Jesus said, ‘Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father who is in heaven is perfect.’ (KJV) in I Peter 1:15, Peter says, ‘But as He who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct.’ This is not some kind of suggestion. It is a command. God wants you to be holy. Period.

Being Holy: Biblical Perspective, Part 3

Part 2 deleted, accidentally. My apology.


you choose to continue to sin, will it be easy to bring you back, listen to what God says through the author of Hebrews in chapter 6 and verses 4-6, ‘For it is impossible for those who were once enlightened, and have tasted the heavenly gift, and have become partakers of the Holy Spirit, and have tasted the good word of God and the powers of the age to come, if they fall away, to renew them again to repentance, since they crucify again for themselves the Son of God, and put Him to an open shame.’

Has He not called us by grace. Yes, indeed He called us by grace but to what? Let’s read I Thess 4:7, where Paul says, ‘For God did not call us to uncleanness but to holiness.’ Verse 8, ‘Therefore he who rejects this does not reject man, but God, who has also given us His Holy Spirit.’ This is not teaching of a man but is from God. You reject God when you choose to live an unholy, sinful life.

This call to holiness is obvious when you become a Christian or when you gave your life to Jesus, repenting of all your sins. It is obvious for a Christian to be holy. We came to Jesus because we wanted freedom from the bondage of our sins. Did we not? Sin held a sway over our lives. Did it not? Far from overcoming it, we were not even able to deal with it in an effective manner. Then, we heard the good news of Jesus Christ and his wondrous work on the cross, shattering the power of sin and delivering us from our sins. God gave us the same power through which He raised Jesus from the dead. Now having received the forgiveness of their sins and power over sin, these disobedient believers have turned back to fulfill their own lustful passions and fleshly desires. Did not Peter refer to these believers as dogs and pigs in II Peter 2: 22? II Peter 2:22, 'But it has happened to them according to the true proverb: "A dog returns to his own vomit," and, "a sow, having washed, to her wallowing in the mire." Revealing that these people were never saved in the first place? 

Does Bible brand dogs and pigs as unclean animals? No, not at all. Listen to what Paul says in I Tim 4:4, 'For every creature of good, and nothing is to be refused...' Dogs and pigs have an inherent quality. That is, a dog will vomit and eat the same and a pig, though it has been washed and cleaned will return to filth. Unless that inherent quality, attribute is changed, dogs and pigs will continue to revel in that kind of behavior. Salvation or born again means that you have been transformed completely. The inherent nature to wallow in sins has been removed. Listen to what God says in Ezekiel 36 and verse 26 and 27, "I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; I will take the heart of stone out of your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. I will put My Spirit within you and cause you to walk in My statutes, and you will keep My judgments and do them." II Cor 5: 17, 'Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.'

Were we saved to fulfill our own lusts and sinful passions? Paul in I Thess 1:9 says, ‘….you turned to God from idols to serve the living and true God…’ We have turned from idols, from sin, to God, to serve Him, to obey Him, if indeed we have turned.

Others argue that the call to holiness is just a talk and there aren't any examples of Christians in the real world who live or have lived a holy life. Let's confront this argument by referring to Hebrews 12:1,2, 'Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith...' The word, therefore, is used to make a conclusion on the basis of what has been said earlier. In chapter 11, the author refers to a great list of stalwarts of faith. In verse 2, he asks us to look to Jesus, stay focussed on Jesus cos He is the author of our salvation, He is the one who will complete our salvation. So, rather than demanding an example to follow, the author asks us to look to Jesus.